Wednesday, June 27, 2007

The Kateie Awards: Saddest hippo edition

Most embarrassing moment (musical category):
When the first notes of “Under Pressure” came on and for a second I got excited it was Rob Van Winkle’s “Ice Ice Baby.” Second place contender: “I’ll Be Watching You” came on at Starbucks, and I was all jazzed thinking “Man, I haven’t heard this P. Diddy song if forever!” (Pouring some iced coffee out for you, Biggie.)

Most infuriating Barista:
The one at 86th and Lex who refuses to only put just a little ice in my coffee. It’s like she’s an evangelical Wal-Mart pharmacist morally opposed to selling Plan B.

Most excitingly confusing email subject line:
“Re: Birthday medicine.” Clearly, this is an awesome invention, one that is long overdue. Does it make me forget my birthday? Remember other people’s birthdays? Make Sept. 8th generally more awesome? (Like it could possibly get better!) I don't care what it is! I'll take it! Luckily “Krystian Jacobs ” has sent me answers. Sidenote: I can’t be the only person who falls for all these spams, can I? I know in my heart that I know no one named Krystian, but I still open it to double check. Every time.

Saddest hippo:
The one on the side of the Pink Hippo Party knockoff van. It looks like it had Down syndrome.

Most likely my future husband:
The Match guy who sent me an e-mail headlined “I used to live in Queens!” When I wrote back saying “While I’m excited for you about you formerly living in Queens, I’m not sure why you told me.” And he admitted the headline was leftover from him writing to someone else. Ah love.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Bwah!

The comments about the songs made laugh out loud. Definitely something I'd do too.