Get out the good china! The pope’s one of two people in the world my mother would break out the good china for on a non-holiday. (The other correct answer is not me, her eldest daughter, but the queen of England for those of you playing at home.) And now he’s in my hood! Down the street, blessing up a storm and sprinkling holy water up the wazoo. (Fun fact: The Catholic Church will make you feel guilty for touching someone's wazoos.)
He was a mere four blocks away yesterday at a church seemingly pulled at random from a (tall pope's) hat. I was telling someone about my plans for the day and actually had to say the sentence, "I just hope the pope doesn't get in the way." In other news, I have absurd problems.
Even though I currently see Jesus as a distant relative to be obligingly visited on holidays, I'm all for seeing visiting dignitaries. I love me some
Thursday night the streets around the U.N. were already blocked off, but the cops let me cut through (hello, security? Damn this honest face of mine.) It was completely silent and empty besides me and was by far the most room I've ever had on a sidewalk. I loved it for two blocks, swinging my arms with wild abandon. Three minutes later I got creeped out and started missing people. Related: I would not do well on any sort of wilderness trek.
But seriously, Ratzinger? You couldn't stay in the country a full week? I don't expect you to tour like Motley Crue or anything, but don't be stingy with America. I know you're 81 and mostly a palate-cleansing pope after JP the 2, but just think of all that great time you'll get in the Popemobile. And the holy waving! You practiced in the mirror for weeks to get the arms at just the right angle.
But no matter how long you stay, you'll still be one of my favorite popes.
Just behind Sergius III, the dude who strangled his prececessor.
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6 comments:
Thanks for the link to the Badass popes. That was a great read.
You're so going to hell.
See you there!
You're so going to hell.
See you there!
Isn't he kind of like Miss America? They parade him around and give him nice clothes, but does he really do anything? They should give Miss America her own city, too.
Jacob - Hilarious, right?
Untrainable - And we'll eat on the good china with some badass popes.
Mickey - Miss America needs to have a pope-mobile thing too.
I don't think anyone wants to shoot Miss America. Catholicism is controversial in some circles. Ever heard a Baptist or Evangelical preacher talk about Catholics? Il Papa needs the bullet-proof bubble. Objectifying women is usually considered pretty kosher by contrast.
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