If an assistant is at work and there’s no one to assist, does she make a sound?

Nope.

It’s 2:00 and I’ve not made a peep. There was an e-mail for me earlier today, so I got to stick a Post-It on my computer that says “Nanette bus. cards” and then promptly forget what it means. (For a while I had one I wrote that just said “Anna?” and I eventually threw it away because it was frustrating me to not know A. who Anna was and B. what she wanted from me. Nobody named Anna has come looking for me though, so I think this has an important lesson: You can get out of doing things by avoiding them. P.S. Boss, I’m just kidding.)

Here’s today's breakdown:

9:04 – arrive at work.

9:12 – call mom.

9:25 – find out that I got her a duvet cover instead of a shower curtain for Christmas. Huh.

9:36 – decline to speak to assorted visiting relatives.

10:10 – write “Nanette bus. cards” on a Post-It.

10:32-10:57 – write previous blog entry recapping Christmas.

11:20 – clean out purse. Find deodorant, two dollars.

11:44 - briefly learn about the life and times of Gerald Ford. Appreciate how he overcame being named Gerald. Wonder if I thought he was already dead.

11:50 – go to bank. Witness man cut in front of woman by removing the retractable barriers while she looped around the maze.

11:51 – consider saying something to him. End up rolling eyes commiseratively with woman.

12:44-1:10 – attempt to get into the American Girl doll store for my cousin’s birthday present. Admit defeat. Realize there are too many people on 5th Avenue/Midtown/planet Earth.

1:20 – buy Whoppers from cafeteria.

1:22 - wonder why sign said "malted milk balls."

1:26 – eat Whopper

1:29 - eat Whopper

1:34 - eat Whopper

1:38 - eat Whopper

Consider eating another Whopper. Blog instead.