Jst ssy nOtto drgs, txtin

I think the great divide of my 20-something generation is text messaging. More specifically text-speak. I may be pecking away for 45-minutes, but damn if I’m not going to type out “you” and “too.” I’ve got spare time. I’ll make the time.

I think for people who had texting in high school, it’s totally different. The people I know just a few years younger than me have no trouble saying “R U going 2?”

Then there are people a few decades older who somehow get a hold of this skill and take to it like they’re bilingual. It’s like hearing your parents saying “dawg” or "fo shizzle." (Sidenote: I know a guy named Rezart, and I always think of him as the guy whose parents Snoopified his name before Snoop could.)

The following is from one of my favorite bosses, who is currently on vacation. (And, obviously, "v rlxd") He told me recently that one of his sons taught him to text message. The result:

Kate: v rlxd, tx. Lst gd...Bt wht r 1) pigybk lon & 2) HELOC? DARK (dnt asume reader knows)...& list othr stories in estate plng series? & owning indiv stk "may add risk" vs "risky" subtle dif bt imptnt; then intro rdrs 2 balance sheet & income ptmt. F u hv othr guidancce frm (project redacted) it trumps me. Bk now 2 vacatn. See u th or send qn f u hv 1. Tx slm

PS these days shd note exchange-traded funds in tandem w/ mutual funds. ETFs pbly deserve own story later unless we've covered already. 10-4 cheers slm

This was in my email this morning. I actually had to get a co-worker who knows him better to translate.

1.) Did he lose the use of opposable thumbs in Florida? 2.) I like when people who say "dnt asume reader knows" send it in an indecipherable text. 3.) Please note the part that says "F u"