Time for my new favorite game: What the hell is wrong with me?In future issues, we’ll examine why other people drinking tea makes me so angry, why I suspect I might have weekend diabetes, why I sometimes wake up with curly hair, and why I think things are purpleish when everyone else in the room says it’s blue or pink.
But first, let’s tackle why I constantly think my phone is ringing. I probably reach for it 20 times a day because I think I hear those first few “dee DE dodolee deee” trilling out of it. But, just like in a horror movie, nobody’s there. (I guess, strictly speaking, in a horror movie, the caller would be inside my purse, but there’s no time for logic when I have problems like this going on.)
It’s not tinnitus because it’s not constant. It strikes when a note similar to the first “dee” of my ringtone is struck somewhere in the vicinity. From experience, I’ve learned these include most, if not all, songs; children’s tiny voices; laughter; espresso machines; horns and squealing breaks.
Next time we’ll tackle why I could watch people push on “pull” doors (and vice versa) all day.
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3 comments:
Fauxcellarm.
I actually already posted to my own blog with this title. Expect to be hearing from a sweating, overweight lawyer with a Southern drawl (and worse, a real one, not that fake ass Hollywood version) about a potential lawsuit soon.
As for the phantom rings, maybe you have the auditory version of "phantom vibration syndrome". Sorry for the link to USA Today. I realize it's the newspaper for people who should just be watching reality television, but I couldn't find the BBC article that I read about this last week.
Max, bonus points for a punny link.
Jacob, bring it on, you and your Foghorn Leghorn lawyer.
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